Journey of Self Exploration & Deeper Understandings

My rational, analytical and academic life as the manager of a central resources laboratory was blown away in early 1995 by a ‘life changing experience’.

That is I spontaneously experienced accessing and interacting directly with many Beings from the nature spirit realm. For a full description of this experience Click Here.

Life Changing Spiritual Awakening Experience Shatters my Views of Reality

This was the start of a spiritual awakening. For me it confirmed the feelings of limitations that I had been experiencing both in science and life in general. Awakenings whether spiritual or otherwise basically kick you up the backside. They let you know directly that things are not as you or society in general thinks they are.

You can approach a spiritual awakening as a Divine Revelation and go on a crusade, you can react to them as a mental aberration to quickly dismiss or you can take them as an intense realization or soul journey and change your life accordingly. For myself, I reacted with wonder and also the question “If these areas (the nature spirit realm) exist but are foolishly dismissed or ridiculed or feared by both science, contemporary religion and society in general then!!! WHAT ELSE IS THERE???”.

I wanted to Explore and Engage with the Subtle to find things out directly Myself

This was one of the reasons I entered science, it was also why I found science so limited, dry and un-empowering. If science was about exploring and confirming what is and what works rather than what only fits into the (severely limited) currently accepted scientific model then we would be living in a very different world indeed. So, my spiritual awakening was the start of a continuous awakening, every week, every day, sometimes every hour there is a new revelation and of course another belief, knowing, realization or model would be shattered in the process.

I came to understand that we experience life through the filters and blinkers of our beliefs, mindsets, conditioned reactions and more so the basic assumptions we hold to either consciously or otherwise. These create expectations and or preconceptions which then act as the defining parameters and in fact as FILTERS for what we experience in such a way that they actually create conceptual and thinking; limits and boundaries. They actually define what we will then accept or believe or even be able to think ‘coherently’ about. The more I could release myself from my basic assumptions and what ‘I believe’ or am convinced ‘must be’ or ‘should be’ then the more I have a chance to both experience something different and actually THINK never mind evaluate in different ways too. In other words this LETTING GO was increasing my choices in what I can not only attract as possibilities BUT they allow me to more accurately EVALUATE such possibilities too.

Moving Beyond ‘Established, Common and Comfortable’ Beliefs

It is said that “seeing is believing”, but it is more truthful to say that your ingrained attitudes and beliefs (or so called facts) have you interpreting reality in limiting ways while ALSO preventing you from seriously thinking about never mind engaging with ideas or understandings outside of these engrained boundaries.

This ‘awakening’ acted as a release from my past limited framework or reference points. This experience blasted away my limited and to be quite honest entirely distorted understandings and increased my flexibility to PERCEIVE never mind to think and to understand in different ways.

I used to relate to my experiences and to those around me from a rational or shall we say mental ‘analytical’ perspective for the most part (as do most of us). This awakening was the start of me learning to perceive and to feel in new ways and to deeper levels.

Changing from a limited mental ‘Thought & Belief’ Space to a Larger ‘Perception, Sensing and Feeling’ Space

The process to release myself from limits, traumas, faulty conceptions, assumptions, beliefs and so on required that I plumb the depths of myself, but paradoxically I could only go as deep as my current beliefs, expectations, preconceptions and assumptions allowed.

To illustrate this with a simple example when I first started I had a particular support team in spirit (I use this term rather than guides as the latter holds more limitations). I also use the term “spirit” as accessing and working with Beings from beyond need have no spiritual function whatsoever (contrary to what many think or believe). This team was initially composed of earth based beings, I had no angels as I held negative preconceptions of them. When I released myself from these preconceptions then the next spirit support team included some angels. As (on other levels) I have been / am an angel (albeit somewhat briefly) then this was an essential but small step for me to start to be able to explore these parts of myself as well as of everything else.

This process continued not only with regards those that I work with but also with what I understood I had to work on to release myself from my own limitations. As this journey proceeded then, with the goal to search for and explore my limits and to find means to move beyond them then I was very quickly moved beyond information and paths on this level.

More and more my training came from beyond and not here.

This was partially to push my level of understanding beyond the usual conceptions presented here. From the time of the original opening up experience I only read about six books over a six year period that had relevance to what was happening to me (I’d read that number each week in the past). I realized later that had I read more or had better contact with other “spiritually” aware people then I would have been very confused and disorientated as very little of what I have experienced is either documented or would have been accepted or understood elsewhere particularly and paradoxically by so called spiritual people themselves.

The RIGHT expertise for the right movements

For example my ‘spirit’ support teams would change every six weeks or so. This was not surprising as one of the directives I myself GAVE each team was that one member of the current team should be looking for and organising the next team to facilitate the next shift.

During particularly intense periods teams would only last a few days before moving on. This steady change facilitated me to remain detached and helped me to more easily let go of those that were instrumental in giving me not only support and encouragement but also the subtle energy means and tools to facilitate these movements. Over a five year period I worked with literally and consciously 10,000’s of different Beings from a huge range of environments, realities and dimensions; Et’s, Angels, Archangels, Star Beings, Nature Spirits, Ascended Masters to name but a very few were some of the earlier ones.

Lots of confused information about entity attachments

Another area that I could have become very confused with had I bought into the negativity and misinformation presented elsewhere is regards entity attachments. For a fair period I spent days at a time releasing entity attachments, sometimes up to a hundred in a day. This continued with literally 1000’s of attachments most of which were dealt with by conscious communication and direct exploration of the existences involved to identify the cause and resolve them.

This process was extremely hard, on the one hand because I had very little support. That is, the best facilitators that I knew for entity release would have been confounded by both my own (somewhat different) approach, my somewhat inherent understanding and trust of my own process as well as the numbers involved and the complexities often required to make a full and honouring release.

It was also very difficult dealing with beings that you have no previous conceptions of from bizarre situations that you are only just remembering. For example on one weekend I dealt with about 10 shape shifter entities from another planetary existence simultaneously. As these types of Being are about ten times stronger than attachments from a human embodied existence they WERE NOT FUN, rather they were frightening, disorientating, confusing and physically completely shattering.

Through these experiences I came to understand that we each (by and large) have literally 1000’s of entity attachments from all our interactions and existences on all levels. That these attachments moreover are rarely expressed, that is for the most part you are unaware of these attachments and ‘seem’ experience no interference from them – they do however exist. As my intention was to resolve all my separations then SO IT WAS and hence all my attachments from all levels have been presented to me for me to resolve.

This entire process was very hard, dealing with entities directly in an organised and almost industrial scale was VERY tiring and at times VERY scary (an understatement). I often found myself on an edge feeling or thinking that ‘If I don’t figure this out soon’ I’m potentially going to be in big trouble or LOST . . . . I learnt to relax in the absolute worst stressful almost ‘life on an edge’ situations . . . . I learnt to figure things out on my own and to NOT give up . . . . so, I always, ALWAYS did figure things out, I got to the point of even under extreme attack seemingly by everything and their dog I’d still be able to retain myself enough to figure out what to do about it . . . . little did I know that I was deliberately being fed these ‘edge of the seat’ scenarios because in the future I really would be absolutely on my own with no backup and no one with the experience that would have ANY clue to ‘correctly or appropriately’ advise me . . .

When I say that this process is continuous then that is what I mean. When I first started subtle energy based self healing I was consciously spending on average six hours each day to directly, actively and with immense focus and intent dedicated to facilitate and support this movement. After about six months this process was becoming an unconscious part of my minute by minute, second by second living experience. So, over another two to three years the six hours dropped to one hour and for the last two years I only have to “keep an eye” on this process and then consciously interject if necessary.

This process is also internal. It is (from one perspective) about relating your feeling and reactions within to your external circumstances. I have spent the last six years on this internal process, spending much time consciously on other energy levels resolving conflicts, negotiating releases from traumas, attachments and limiting agreements and so on and so on. Each step in this exploration and movement has brought me increased freedom in my self expression, relationships, perceptions and how I live my life not only here but on all levels. It has also brought me courage, joy, patience, much increased happiness, fearlessness, wonder, acceptance and awe.

When I wrote ‘I spent the last 6 years’ in this process . . . . that was 9 years ago . . . I can confirm in no uncertain terms . . . . that I was trained well and ALL that I describe here was necessary as a minimum for me to cope with what I’ve encountered and had to deal with since these earlier times . . . read the ‘scary’ pages to get more understanding of what I mean by this.