"Earth as a Simulation Series 4: This Series offers MANY pages of Evidence that many Anomalous Experiences, Plus 'Exceptional' Abilities & Skills can be explained 'IF' we are Simulated copied people being Simulated with Less Advanced Technologies resulting in ourselves having Anomalous Experiences that relate to Hi-Tech Neural Implants & CNS Enhancements that the person we are simulating HAD, but which we are a long way from developing here!!!"

16 Comments

1. Kay
   November 19, 2015 @ 2:04 pm

   I connected to a LOT of technology both within and outside of myself. It felt like the point where more of me was running on my self designed hardware than the actual ‘wetware’ was a long time ago and in a galaxy far far away!

   As i proceeded through the focus i am slightly light headed and my vision is ultra detailed which is how i get before any ‘interesting’ visual systems come online and start doing ‘stuff’. Generally the sim does stuff to stop me at this point. I feel more like a floating ‘head’ with a body dangling from it.

   There appears to be a semi-hard ‘cover’ over my right eye which is stopping me zooming in on details. I am also getting blurry inner visual representations of all of the components and manufacturing schematics of whatever i am looking at. Might point towards why i tend not to need instructions to put things together. The build process is ‘obvious’ just from looking at the parts.

2. Annabelle
   November 19, 2015 @ 10:59 pm

   This is the 2nd attempt to leave feedback. First feedback got blown away. Working this thru 2 devices now. As I start to type – a song comes on “ Wake me up when it is all over” J
   I did not have any strong reaction, nausea or headache this time and gave specific instructions not to cause personal crap.
   1. While reading the second paragraph I experienced a strong pain one inch under my left eye – in the far left side of my face. Felt like someone was trying to insert a needle into my face. This is my distance mono vision eye.
   2. During the 4th paragraph a got a strong vision of 8-10 patients sitting in what looked to be dentist chairs. This was inside a dimly lit area that looked like a dirty old cluttered garage. They were all being drilled into their face and having “piercings” installed. It almost seemed some were there against their will and strapped down. The feeling was VERY creepy
   3. As of 2 days ago- both eyes have started randomly flickering – one or the other, upper or lower eyelids – quite a bit. The online definition says caused by “Inappropriate Photoreceptor Activation” maybe from that visual focus?? I do not feel I fit the usual diagnosis of alcohol or stress or disease. Must be a coincidence

   Will try again later…..

3. Trent
   November 20, 2015 @ 12:49 am

   Line 1: A tiny shift but nothing substantial. Feels like a small energetic ‘spark’ or ‘jolt’.

   Line 2: Large energy shifts, especially in and around my head. My eyes closed themselves and I entered a ‘sleepy/dreamy’ state but still ‘alert’. A lot of blinking and twitching around my forehead. I perceive a golden/yellow beam of light push out the top of my head and it extends ‘infinitely’ upward.

   Energies continue to shift throughout my head, and a ‘pulsating’ begins aimed at the center of my hairline. It felt like ‘energy’ within and throughout my head was going in ‘waves’ toward this location. No visuals, no auditory experiences.

   I stay in this state for a while (around 10 minutes) before opening my eyes. I feel VERY different and ‘weird’. Before using the statement I felt more ‘matched’ to the environment around me, whereas now I feel very dense and heavy. It feels like a ‘weight’ over my chest, upper back, shoulders and extending up and around my head. It feels as if.. rather than perceiving the environment around me ‘directly’, it’s now being processed and perceived ‘through’ this ‘something else’.

   Line 3: Feel a lot of resistance as i’m reading this. End up repeating around 5 times until it feels ‘okay’. Again enter a sleepy/dreamy state. Tingling across the top of my head, and again a lot of blinking and twitching. Experience seems to be focused around my forehead.

   Still feeling a lot of resistance to this, so I repeat the statement a few more times. Experience a shift toward the direct center of my forehead – something is there, and I feel like the sim is trying very hard to prevent me from connecting to this. ‘Energetically’ it feels much like an ‘excavation’ – trying to get to and access that thing.

   The sim starts trying to distact me by prompting me to stop doing this, to do other things, and is giving me random distracting thoughts. Eventually my eyes open and i’m basically just staring straight ahead, blurry vision while these ‘energy shifts’ continue. Feels like I made some progress but still couldn’t get at that ‘thing’. All up spent around 15 minutes or so on this focus and have decided to stop for now.

   Line 4: Is there an error here? “I fully and absolutely connect now to absolutely all scripted experiences of myself ‘TO’ (emphasis mine) saving..”. This was disrupting my ability to read the statement coherently (and after the first readthrough I left out the word ‘to’) so I repeated this statement around 7 times (a few times I was reading the words ‘out of order’ etc thus the repeats).

   Went into a sleepy/dreamy state again and got a “OH BOY…” type feeling.. as if something ‘significant’ was coming. I calmed myself down and allowed myself to just ‘experience’. Similarly to when using the previous statements, the ‘focus’ seems to be on the direct center of my forehead, and the middle of my hairline.. but this time these areas seemed to be focused on as part of a ‘larger area’ rather than focused specifically, directly and ‘only’ on these areas.

   A lot of ‘tingles’ around the top of my head, and my head starts to feel clearer/expansive. Around 5 minutes in I start to think that i’m not experiencing anything ‘significant’ so I almost stop the process, but decide to continue. A few more minutes and suddenly my whole face (jaw, facial muscles, nose, forehead, eyes, etc) all ‘tense up’ which seemed strange to me. I wasn’t sure whether I should be allowing this to happen or if I should try to relax myself more.. I decide to allow it.

   A few minutes later and my face starts to relax, when suddenly I have a visual ‘flash’ of a ‘park area’.. but I don’t know what this place is or where it is.. seems strange. I then have an incredibly high detailed image appear of a house I used to live in. At first the image is just of the house itself, but then the image ‘fleshes itself out’ including the fencing, driveway, garden, garage, etc and I seem able to view this image from different vantage points (including from a viewpoint which seems to be ‘in the sky’ somewhere.. looking at the property from slightly above and at an angle).

   I then start receiving visuals of ‘temporary artifacts’ associated with that property – for example ‘cars’ which were owned by my family while we lived there. Once again these were very high detailed images.

   Now.. I only lived in this house up until the age of 12!!!! and my grandparents lived there for around a year or so more before moving out, so these are quite early memories for me to be recalling.

   Anyway, I decide to ‘look’ at the next house I lived in, and again receive very high detailed images. I ‘explore’ this house visually for a few minutes, but as I already have a ‘general’ recall of this house (though in nowhere near as high detail) I decide it would be more interesting to check out something else..

   I remembered that about a week ago I was trying to recall what my first car looked like.. I remembered the model and had a very vague idea of the shape of it, but that’s all. So i’m thinking about this car when I again receive incredibly high detailed images of it. EXACTLY AS IT LOOKED including shape, colour, interior, etc. I seem to be able to look at this car from many angles and vantage points (though none of these were in the sky).

   I started to think about what I ‘experienced’ while in that car when suddenly I was both viewing AND ‘experiencing’ a specific memory from within the vehicle.. I was able to feel what the car felt like, such as the seat covers, the steering wheel, etc but I was also experiencing HOW I FELT AT THAT TIME including my mood, emotions, the experience, etc. This was amazing but at the same time quite a shock, so I decided to stop here.

   I must say that this is one of the most amazing ‘ablities’ i’ve ever experienced, and i’ll surely be accessing and exploring this technology further in future..

   I’ve decided to stop the focuses here, and will complete the others later. Will keep you updated. Thank you

   • Clive
     November 20, 2015 @ 12:59 pm

     Hey Trent, GOOOOD effort.

     Haha – the ‘to’ or no ‘to’ . . . when writing this focus I can remember re-reading that line and being completely unable to ‘compute’ if the ‘to’ should stay or go. I decided to come back to it later BUT . . . was obviously made to forget. That line and others have now been edited and the whole focus is somewhat ‘better’ now.

     I’ve also had the least feedback on this memory implant angle which suggests that it’s being subjected to a priority ‘blocking’ by the simulation software – this is likely because it’s twinned with a lot of ‘evidence’ pages a) confirming they’ll be memory anomalies for simulated copied people as well as b) many, MANY implants that ‘hook’ into memory or use or save memory ‘off line’ as it were. Which the latter half of your detailed comment confirms.

4. Mo
   November 21, 2015 @ 8:24 am

   I am going to have to do this exercise again at a later time.. I can only get on your website at specific times and for short times or I get slammed really hard. While reading this I pretty much started to lose my focus, my head started to spin (still is) and its like I am unable to read it for real. Will try again soon.

5. Nina
   November 22, 2015 @ 2:19 pm

   First time: I initially thought of a contact book with people’s snail mail address, phone number, mobile number, and email address organized in alphabetical order. Then I accessed a room filled with different databases of all the people I’ve ever known and met. If I meet someone who seems familiar to me, my memory implant scans the databases to see if I have really met the person before. Maybe this is why it sometimes takes minutes before I recognize someone. I tend to remember people based on the circumstances I’ve met them (school, work, etc.)

   I also thought of chat transcripts I’ve saved, which records my interactions with the people I’ve met online, and how the intent of this focus contradicts my desire to forget certain people.

   Second time: The words “physical memory enhancement tech” reminded me of photo albums from my childhood and the journals I had written at that time. I remembered my ability to recall history lessons generally well compared to most of my peers. I recalled memories of my first car — what it looked like and how fond I was of that car. And I remembered some of my deceased pet birds, dogs, and rabbits.

   The words “sensory data save and recall implant” reminded me that that implant didn’t feel very useful in self-defense. The length of time it took for me to learn them would be roughly the same time it took for me to forget them from disuse and lack of practice.

   However, there were times when I could automatically protect myself from harm. One time, I did the “trust fall” as part of the “trust exercise” and no one was able to catch me on time. I merely landed on my butt and rolled safely on the floor without any serious injury. Yet no one taught me that move…it felt like a reflexive defense movement. And I did not learn it from the aikido class I took one summer as a teen.

   ——————————————————————-

   I began to wonder whether the save and recall ability explains why certain thoughts or memories loop into my mind when feeling depressed. If I saved the memories as they happened in real time, then later replayed them several times to see where I went wrong so I could learn from my mistakes…might the simulation software have disabled my ability to control them consciously?

   I thought of the mental radio that tends to annoy me when I’m thinking along topic lines that the simulation doesn’t want me to think about. I know that it can record any new song I have played for at least three to four times straight. Now, I make sure I don’t play catchy songs too often to minimize its influence on me. Or I play a lengthy classical piece or listen to a song only once or twice so the song won’t register in my mind.

   ————————————————————————-

   Eventually, I connected to the following:

   – people who created memory chips for cameras, video cams, computers, mobile phones, and anything that records audio and video

   – kinesthetic technology that could record movements and to manufacturers that could design technology that simulated movement (like Nintendo Wii)

   – the manufacturers that created exercise machines like treadmills and elliptical machines so people could simulate being on the road when all along they’re “running” inside a confined area

   – game manufacturers who produced realistic arcade games like mecha piloting experiences, horse racing simulations, fishing simulations, car racing simulations, Dance Mania, Guitar Hero, drumming game, and other arcade games

   – apps related to organizing data (especially photos and videos)

   – hell houses where the Christians depict various sins (like gluttony or abortion) and then depict heaven to make the people repent for their sins and turn to Christ, as well as haunted houses where I am usually unable to recall anything out of fear. I thought of the following equation: anxiety = fear = forgetfulness (Is this why fear is the favorite weapon of choice when controlling others?)

   In the ninth paragraph, my mind went blank when I began to think of how the camera lens (eye implant) captures an image and stores it onto the memory card (memory implant) and how both implants are encased in the camera’s body (physical avatar). For now, I’m unable to figure out how these implants can be integrated into a person’s emotional system.

   In the last paragraph, I managed to connect to a workshop with specializations for remembering certain data, like chess games, history / timeline, or specific aspects of a person’s data. But my focus fizzled out at that point.

   I tried going back to a comment on driving-related memory anomalies that I had been trying to revise for the past several days without success. I thought of how it took so much effort for me to remember those anomalies and how I’d have writing block or mental jumbling every time I tried to write about them. In the past, all I could remember was that I committed a violation and that I was caught by the police, but what happened in between tend to be “blank.” So the blanket explanation I would (automatically) give to the police was that I was “not paying attention” on the road or that I was panicky because I was lost.

   Looking back, I think I had those mind blanks so I’d not notice the anomalous situations that led to the scripted outcome of getting into trouble with the law. I also think these driving-related anomalies have to do with the simulation software using my original form’s vision implants, memory implants, and EAAS role against me in out-of-context ways. (The form I am simulating was in charge of choreographing simulated people’s pre-defined outcomes, such as significant events, life changes, interactions, major decisions. And it made sure that simulated people won’t notice the “artificial” way events played out in their lives. This is why I sometimes feel that a particular life event seems right [or part of my script] but the circumstances leading to the event feels wrong.)

6. Iris
   November 23, 2015 @ 10:02 am

   Around the fourth paragraph of this focus, I remembered an instance where previously sealed off or buried feelings or memories towards someone would return under certain circumstances.

   There was an instance where a friend and I agreed to stop talking to each other after we engaged in online behavior that almost damaged his real-life relationship. I remembered the anger and hurt feelings that overrode whatever friendly feelings I used to have towards him. When we broke the silence after a few months, he said that I seemed cold towards him. He asked if I could remember being friends with him. I said yes, but I could not access the friendly feelings towards him until both of us apologized for our past actions and I felt emotionally safe towards him again.

   In most cases, however, I have great difficulty restoring lost or forgotten memories and emotions. For instance, I no longer feel close towards friends who used to be possessive of me even if they’ve changed for the better or towards friends whom I used to have major conflicts with even if we’ve reconciled and forgiven each other. Even if I have fun talking to them, I seem to be withholding a part of my real self from them, and it’s not just because I’m keeping my interest in this Soul Healer site a secret from them.

   My thoughts drifted to the initial difficulty I had in recalling my first cybersex with someone I had a crush on, especially the image of him masturbating in front of me and the fear and tension I experienced while touching myself (even though all he saw was my face and my bare shoulders). I don’t feel attracted to him now, but the past feelings of misguided / manipulated attraction sometimes replays automatically to divert me from thinking of anything the sim doesn’t want me to think about.

   Writing the above paragraphs triggered mental diversions, particularly the fear of the consequences I might have to face if my former group were to find out that I secretly had video sex with some of their members.

   The sixth paragraph triggered mostly mind blank. I thought of sex dolls, which I perceive as subtle forms interfaced into physical forms. I thought of the comment Clive had written about VR aversion therapy here.

   If I were subjected to VR sex and attraction aversion therapy, then all memories stored in my memory implants would be deleted, while the negative emotions associated with sex would remain. Any previous positive sexual experiences would have been suppressed. I would have difficulty accessing all the horrific scenarios that I had been subjected to, or I’d remember nothing at all.

   Eventually I connected to my experiences related to sex and sexuality:

   – my mom strongly insisting that I can have sex only after marriage

   – discomfort over the idea of losing my virginity to a jerk

   – the difficulty in taking away the fear of unwanted pregnancy and possible abortion (which is illegal in my country) despite awareness of various contraceptives to stay safe during physical sex

   – the first time I accidentally stumbled upon a female masturbation website and followed some basic instructions to stimulate myself

   – all the instances my mom suspected me of having online sex and the excuses I invented so she could not catch me in the act

   – memories of covering my nakedness under the blanket whenever my mom or dad checks to see if I am sleeping in my bedroom (my bedroom lights are turned off).

   – fears of rape triggering when I pass by my parents watching crime shows on TV

   – instances when watching porn or examining sex toys out of curiosity aroused me sexually

   – keeping my sexual habits secret from my family and friends out of fear of social disapproval

   – fear and discomfort in entering bars by myself for fear of date rape

   – discomfort over dating and courtship, as well as reluctance to start a relationship with anyone, much less mingle with the opposite gender for the sake of finding a date or partner

   – the depression that automatically triggers when I think that a good relationship is out of my reach unless it’s kept a secret from my parents and friends. My past negative sexual experiences sometimes remind me that loving others hurt.

   – thoughts on whether the Catholic ritual of confessing your sins and having them absolved by the priest in the name of God represents memory wipes or energies blanketing negative feelings towards behavior that the church considers sinful

   ——————————————————————

   Other observations:

   – I think my memory implants automatically saves and records any event or interaction that I deem significant, which in this technologically slowed-down simulation would translate to me writing and taking photos of those events.

   – I am able to recall my travels more when alone than when with a group. When with groups, I tend to focus more on my interactions with them than on the scenery, not to mention that the limited time spent in certain areas means I had less time to absorb interesting information.

   – It seems to take an awfully long time for me to forget any significantly negative memory from my mind. I think it’s because memory wipe devices don’t exist in this simulated world yet. Otherwise, a push of the button is enough to wipe out memories instantly.

   On the other hand, maybe not having memory wipe technology yet is a good thing because I might have abused it, and I might have end up not even knowing who I am or who I used to be.

7. Annabelle
   January 8, 2016 @ 2:02 am

   Working on exercises the last week has been grueling. The amount of distractions, family, and health issues was unbelievable and drained my time. I did make a point to re-read an entire series each day but could not concentrate on a single focus. Just when everything seemed to calm down, I started to get a lot of nice email offers, bonuses, and gift cards in the mail, refunds from businesses, etc. I though – this is great – I should drop what I am doing and go shopping. Then I thought – wait a minute – is this just another distraction disguised in “sheep clothing?”
   So I dive back in.

   3rd attempt
   I immediately see a large silver wheel, huge, about 30 ft. in diameter, standing upright and rotating counter clockwise. I thought – “oh boy – another bicycle wheel”. This wheel then populated itself with the buckets that would normally hold people like a Ferris wheel – except the buckets / seats looked more like closed metal boxes. As the wheel turned, and each box reached 8 o’clock position, it flew off the wheel and into my face. This continued to happen and I kept dodging the flying boxes. It became so irritating that I stopped.

   4th attempt next day
   I connect to a large silver extension type ladder laying horizontal running from 9 o’clock to 3 o’clock against a pitch-black background. The ladder was sparkling. I thought this was yet another distraction but stuck with this and tried to drill beyond it. Then behind the ladder a series of icons with photos of faces started to appear. It was as if someone unzipped a huge file and the icons / photos streamed out very fast. Square icons, outlined in blue and white, and each contained a picture of the face of a man or woman. Thousands kept appearing and the people were all different, all shapes and sizes and ages. Under each face photo was a white strip containing an alphanumeric code that all started with a “V”. It was impossible to see past the ladder to collect any specific code, but each code was at least 10 characters long. I watched from a position in the lower left hand corner and tried to understand what this meant. A manila folder appeared in my left arm and suddenly all of the photos started to transfer / download into the manila folder. Every last one and the manila folder snapped shut under my arm. I “felt “ like I was supposed to have this folder, but did not understand what it was for. I waited and could not connect with the meaning of what I should do with the folder.

   • Clive
     January 8, 2016 @ 12:40 pm

     Not sure what the first lot signifies BUT the latter seems to relate to some ‘memory photo’ recall possibilities. The ladder could be construed to be a representation of a camera film of photos (being pulled out and laid out flat)? Although a ladder like this could also represent a closed ‘zip’? I.e. this ladder image is a good representation of a zipped file of photo images!!!

     As such having a set up unzipped rapidly displayed images in parallel to the ‘ladder’ being displayed makes sense (and displayed in a way that could be construed as ‘piss taking’ by the simulation!!!!) – Haha

8. Iris
   April 4, 2016 @ 2:09 am

   I wrote down notes last March 15 but I became busy, and I went on vacation, so I kept putting off this comment until now.

   1 — I connected to shared memories and emails, especially those involving two or more people.

   2 — I connected to my audio-video recording implant (works like a digital point-and-shoot camera with video function) and to some kind of technology that automatically translated my thoughts into written text that goes with the images and videos that my recording implant takes. I felt that the text and images and video clips can be updated live onto some kind of social media or other online platform. And it’s all inside the head.

   I felt I once had a phase where I recorded a lot of experiences for research and for recording precious moments with loved ones. The photos and videos I took “aided the recall of sensory perception or past event.” In this life, I felt that I generally remember family vacations better than the rest of my family because of my original form’s implants. I often took on the role of family photographer and was often in charge of compiling the vacation photos into albums.

   3 — I felt that this “save and recall implant” was one of my most treasured ones but that at some point, I had to give it up.

   4 — I felt there had been moments when the recording implant saved negative events that I’d rather forget, so I would delete them. There had been instances too when happy events trigger bad memories after having negative interactions with people I used to associate with positively. I’d delete them too, but it wasn’t easy purging those memories because whatever emotions I have towards them would still be there.

   5 — I accessed what felt like a room filled with pictures and videos of everything that had transpired in my life so far — or at least the ones I was able to record. (I felt I was too young to record my soul birth and early soul childhood, so I do not have any photos and videos of these.) The images circled around the room in slow motion. After a brief moment of awe, I began to feel overwhelmed with all the data around me and felt the need to trim them down to a manageable size.

   6 — I saw myself in the operating table. Surgeons performed surgery on my right eye and brain to insert the recording implant onto my physical body. The implant connected to my heart so that whenever I feel any strong emotion, the recording implant would be prompted to start recording automatically.

   I began to feel that my recording implant eventually became corrupted because of its automatic functions. And that the corruption has been worsened in this simulated earth space because I (as the simulated form) have more negative than positive experiences in this life.

   7 — I am not sure if at some point, I downgraded my implant when I no longer needed it because I no longer wanted the automatic functions of the “superior” recording implant.

   8 — In my vision, I saw my current dad (who is not my soul dad) install the recording implant into my CNS. (He used to take a lot of photos when I was a child.)

   I began to feel that my dad in this life was more of a buddy whom I shared common interests in film and photography. (I’m still not sure if my original form had met him or if he’s merely a stand-in for someone I originally knew.) I began to remember times when he bought my first camera or the one time he took me to the optometrist (instead of my mom), as well as the time when he installed surveillance cameras inside our home and office.

   • Matt
     April 5, 2016 @ 1:00 am

     What you wrote reminds me a lot of the third installment of the series ‘Black Mirror’:

     I felt I once had a phase where I recorded a lot of experiences for research and for recording precious moments with loved ones. The photos and videos I took “aided the recall of sensory perception or past event.” In this life, I felt that I generally remember family vacations better than the rest of my family because of my original form’s implants. I often took on the role of family photographer and was often in charge of compiling the vacation photos into albums.

     3 — I felt that this “save and recall implant” was one of my most treasured ones but that at some point, I had to give it up.

     4 — I felt there had been moments when the recording implant saved negative events that I’d rather forget, so I would delete them. There had been instances too when happy events trigger bad memories after having negative interactions with people I used to associate with positively. I’d delete them too, but it wasn’t easy purging those memories because whatever emotions I have towards them would still be there.

     Not sure if you’ve seen this before, but if not I’d watch this to get context:

     https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Entire_History_of_You_%28Black_Mirror%29

     If you’re the type to not want to read about the episode before you watch, it is basically about some of the ‘consequences’ of having an audiovisual implant that saves/ records all your memories and how this would play out in someone’s life.

     So it might help engage with/ understand these areas?:

     4 — I felt there had been moments when the recording implant saved negative events that I’d rather forget, so I would delete them. There had been instances too when happy events trigger bad memories after having negative interactions with people I used to associate with positively. I’d delete them too, but it wasn’t easy purging those memories because whatever emotions I have towards them would still be there.

     • Iris
       April 29, 2016 @ 1:11 pm

       Hi Matt. Thanks for mentioning Black Mirror, and sorry for the late reply. For a long time, I struggled with organising my notes into a decent comment until I did the Healing Focus # 1 to target resistance. Only then did I realise that my the leftover fear and aversion towards my negative sexual memories had put me off from writing.

       I watched all three episodes of Black Mirror’s Season One weeks ago. I can relate to replaying past events over and over again to figure out what’s wrong or suspicious about certain interactions or observations. The sex stuff presented in those episodes felt like scenarios that I was forced to go through during my VR reprogramming phase (and probably in my original form’s non-VR phase too).

       ——————

       I did this focus a few times this month. Here, I’ve merged my notes from both April 6 and April 28. Everything I’ve written here is based on the Black Mirror episode called “The Entire History of You.”

       1 — I connected to my version of the Grain, the audiovisual save-and-recall memory implant featured in Black Mirror.

       2 — I recalled a disturbing scene where the couple masturbated by using their Grain to replay earlier videos of more passionate sex during the early days of their relationship. I remembered the guilt and repulsion I felt whenever I couldn’t stop myself from mentally replaying past cybersex scenes with my previous online partners or fantasising about them while masturbating. I felt that I watched similar replays as part of my VR reprogramming aversion therapy against sex.

       (Update: I still have compulsive sexual issues sometimes, but at least I no longer fantasize about my partners. When sexual fantasies come up, the guys that show up tend to be generic.)

       3 — Prior to my VR aversion reprogramming, I sensed that I used my save and recall implant to record intimate scenes and arguments with my original partner/s.

       “Retrieving absolutely any saved memory” — I felt that I sometimes hid my stored memory files before embarking on missions where I think the police officials and security check personnel would scan my entire timeline. I imagined myself fooling them by engaging in “safe” activities for 24 hours so that if they check my Grain, they would not feel suspicious at all.

       4 — I envisioned myself reminiscing the past by re-watching past recordings (translated here as replaying past memories mentally). One scene showed a video clip of me laughing with a female friend, which triggered sadness because the recording took place a long time ago.

       5 — Slight fear triggered as I began to sense that I was accessing sexual memories. I felt that any positive memories related to sexual intimacy had been hijacked and repurposed for the VR aversion reprogramming therapy.

       6 — I had fleeting visions of loved ones undergoing sexual abuse. But the visions lasted in nanoseconds — not enough for me to view them. Then my mind went blank even if the fear persisted.

       Doing the hijack focus showed a scene where I was forced at gunpoint to delete my stored memories or show my stored memories to particular people or else I (or rather, my avatar) would be killed. I was paralysed while standing in front of the hacker.  On the other hand, the CNS focus gave me a feeling that I had my Grain extracted so I could eventually forget about past relationships.

9. Richard
   December 5, 2016 @ 8:19 am

   Ok, back here after a couple of years, but can’t be exact. Some fear about posting, due to set backs, and attacks. Did one exercise, and got a control room with overview, programming centre. Head split and frozen in light fields, body largely rendered impotent. Neural pathways are mapped, and projected on an intricate map, like a life tableau. Difficult to even contemplate doing this work, due to deep paralyzing fear and impotence, sleepiness. Narcissistic identity programs running keep me running in a maze, continually programed with pop songs. Keep up the good work Clive.

   • Clive
     December 9, 2016 @ 11:55 pm

     Hi Richard try the first focus on this page here (read the green TABS) and then use “deep paralyzing fear and impotence trying to stop me helping myself, sleepiness, all narcissistic identity programs keep me running in a maze, and or anything generating pop songs in my head” as a ‘targetting statement’

10. Carlie
    December 10, 2016 @ 10:34 pm

    I experienced pain and pressure in my entire head while doing this exercise. It was WAY more than usual. Typically while reading content and doing other exercises I have noticed a dull throbbing concentrated in my forehead but this felt like my head was about to burst from pressure. I had difficulty concentrating as well.

    An image came to me of someone, I think a man, in a very large dark room. I got the impression that it was like a warehouse or storage facility with extremely high ceilings that seem to go on forever and a very large building overall. At first I thought it was an office because my ‘screenshot’ or my view of him was close up and he was standing over a desk or work place looking at a large piece of paper/papers maybe like the size of a blueprint. He was standing and concentrating diligently on whatever he was working on/reading, perhaps searching for something…. There was a small light like a desk lamp then I got the sense that he was in more of a warehouse type place. They more I recall or think about what I ‘seen’ the more it expands which makes me think I’m just making it up…. He is alone and he is extremely enthralled in whatever he is doing, I think if I were standing in front of him that he wouldn’t even notice I was there. I don’t know what he is working on my point of view does not let me see.

    This image/thought/impression became clearer when I stopped focusing on the pain in my head and instead on what I was seeing.

11. Julie
    February 20, 2017 @ 3:05 am

    It took me several attempts to even start remembering the experiences. I’m standing on huge rocks, feeling really small, and a massive tsunami wave is about to crash over me. Yet it doesn’t and I realize it’s just a projected image. I walked through it like in a videogame and I found myself in an infinite room full of computers, with scripts running on the screens in a programming language what seemed to be a mix of numbers and letters. I asked to be taken to the computer with all my scripts. I then saw all the suffering I went through during all of my lifetimes in a blink of an eye and how I’m surrounded by a web of wires making me do things, react to things, fell drawn to things/ people. I got really pissed off and told them that I am a free being and that I want to rewrite all of this BS. I sat in front of my computer and was able to read into the script of my currently troubled personal relationship – yet when I attempted to rewrite it, I was not able to even “conceive’ any alternative script.

    The next moment I was in front of a candy-themed amusement part – I could hear people laughing and having a good time, but I stood right outside of it and everything around was grey, dead, a war zone. Suddenly a soldier appeared and started shooting at me – I felt intense fear and then I realized that I couldn’t be killed so I grabbed the soldier and asked him to bring me to his boss. He took me in front of a huge throne upon which an Ascended Master look-alike guy is seated. I ask him who he is and why he is doing the shit that he’s doing and he responds that he is Archangel Michael and he is just following the rules of the game.

    I’m not able to stay focused for longer than a few minutes. Memories of past lives flash in front of my eyes where I’m a sex slave, used by many men over the course of several lifetimes and made belief that it was my free choice to choose that for myself and that I enjoyed it. Feel a strong urge to watch porn with several men sharing a woman.