To find someone that can help you means that you have to be open about the approach that they use and YOU YOURSELF have to be open to making the movement that brings about change.
Although we talk about moving completely into freedom and exploring the means to achieve this, what most people don’t realize is that being free is not necessarily related to being happy. It is actually quite easy to be happy or very happy but not actually be free at all. For an example of how this is EASILY and falsely achieved then read this HERE. This example explains how someone ‘happy / blissful’ state was achieved by the use of some ‘bolt on’ subtle energy technology and this example illustrates that in this entirely FALSE so called spiritual state she had no or little incentive to explore anything.
So, when we talk with some people they say ‘Sounds great (or weird) or whatever but I am fine, I am happy, I don’t have any problems’. This may or many NOT be true as in the example given this woman had lots of debilitating issues BUT in her enforced and artificial happy and blissie feeling state she felt no incentive to think about these never mind of taking action to resolve them.
The real question is, are you free to make ANY free choice in the moment without the pressure of past traumas, conditioned responses, limited belief systems and mindsets OR worse without the pressure of entirely stupid past spiritual or healing efforts making you feel artificially good and so sabotage you from REALLY being aware of the extent of your issues never mind offering a negative incentive to go resolve them? Are you FREE to identify and make an effort to try and resolve limiting issues?
For example: many people are professional mothers (even without children and not being female), their whole lives revolve around being there for others, with no or little ability to be there for themselves. Now from one perspective this is great, but from another would it not be much better to be able to have the choice to switch into being the mother when it is appropriate but also to be able to mother yourself too? Being able to do this means that you have a free choice, not being able to do this means that you are stuck.
You may also appreciate that being stuck does not necessarily mean that you will be unhappy at least initially. Making changes is often scary and doing this makes people feel uncertain or unsure or insecure. This is the paradox about what we do. Being happy does not necessarily mean that you are in anyway free to make free choices about all areas of your life. Rather feeling happy often means it’s easier to do nothing. This applies not only to your life here but to the lives that you are having everywhere.
This is why we talk about new possibilities, new options to living. We are not saying that how someone is living now is wrong, we are saying that there are other possibilities and from our experience they are worth investigating. However, the difficult thing is that most of us are so embedded in our particular way of living that to even to contemplate living another way would make us anxious at best and terrified at worst.
Taking the above mothering example. OK, you decide that perhaps having a choice would be a good idea? You think about it and realize some of the ramifications. For example what are the people going to say that are currently dependent on you? Are they going to be happy about this change? Almost certainly not. Will they support you to make this change? Almost certainly not. OK, how do you know that these people are only dependent on you because you make them dependent? That they perhaps also don’t really have a choice? Those who do have a choice will respect your decision and support it.
Those who don’t will themselves have to change and learn to be more independent – i.e. freer. Great? Well no, not if the meaning of your life is measured by your mothering role and the meaning of their life is measured by how much they are mothered?
Then you can argue; but people respect me for this, people appreciate me, I don’t know how to do anything else, I feel fulfilled and so on and they can argue, I am loved, someone cares about me, here is someone who wants to look after me, this is me.
We know some people who have been stuck in this role for hundreds of life times, we also know some soul’s that have these qualities as part of their being and have been playing this role within virtually all existences on all levels since their creation. We have to say that it is very much easier to stay the same. It is easier in that most people / souls have a long history of playing certain limited roles. Roles (particularly soul roles) with a long history feel very comfortable (however limiting they are). When this is the case even contemplating change can make you feel very uncomfortable.
When we have moved on from some of our own favourite roles we find ourselves entering a space or phase where we feel very insecure. We feel like this because we have NO EXPERIENCE of this new way of being or living. Our soul has no past experience to draw upon, it is having to fly by the seat of its pants in the moment, trusting that somehow everything is going to be all right – which of course it always is. This for us is true soul freedom.
Now the thing is you only feel comfortable because you are used to something. Think about this; I myself have made lots of such changes. The first was very scary, the second less so, by about the two hundredth if you go a few weeks without changing then YOU START TO GET UNCOMFORTABLE because making changes like this is now entirely normal and comfortable.
Comfortable basically equals what you are used to, and nothing more.
This is why people who put up with dreadful and debilitating circumstances for many years cannot make a move because this terrible limiting traumatic situation is now well within their comfort zone. They have made adjustments to cope and re-adjusting so if they change then this will put them into different circumstances which, although may be better wont be comfortable (at least not for a while).